There are many minor anxieties that can easily interfere with the many happy moments when a child starts school. It is all about a child feeling secure and having success in simple, memorable ways. Early positive feelings have an impact on later success and understanding the purpose of learning.

Consider:

1. Starting school is all about new faces, images, smells, sounds and feelings.

I suggest:

Hold the child’s hand firmly and stay with them until they are secure in the class. Also reassure them that you will return exactly when school finishes and clearly identify where that will be. This is a promise to definitely keep.

2. Starting school is all about what others think of you:

I suggest:

Reassure the child that meeting new friends is all good. Tell them that you are pleased that they are meeting new children. You are not looking for one particular friend to be established

3. Understanding the routine of the day can be overwhelming.

I suggest:

Talk to the child about what is a routine and tell them that you will be happy to hear about all the differences that the day presents.

4. Not all children can talk about their day and just as we struggle to record our day, they sometimes need time before they disclose the experience of school.

I suggest:

Make a simple chart which starts with one and ends with ten. Ask then to tell you how the day has gone - is it one out of ten or higher? This is easy for children to explain a feeling and not over talk the situation. Remember, it is all about the feeling they experience.

5. A big part of school is feeling success on the schoolyard and although teachers direct children’s movements there is still the child’s capacity to form a friend.

I suggest:

Be careful not to set early high expectations here. Some children who are more verbal will engage quicker with children on the yard. It is important that children feel they can engage with different students and move on to others. Children listening and moving around to different groups suggests their ability to listen and engage with different students.

Encourage your child to learn about many children. No one personality is the best choice, although this can be difficult as students want a close friend early in their years at school.

6. Early in term one children notice differences between themselves. Some children talk more in class and demand more attention and others just simply move quickly through teacher’s expectations and appear to be in control. Other students are quiet and take time to reflect and process what is going on around them.

I suggest:

Encourage you child to enjoy the experience of just being at school. Explain that enjoying the experience of learning is more important than feeling the best at any one activity. Remind them that everyone is different and will respond to the learning experience differently.

7. First term can seem long and tiring after the initial joy of starting has worn off the family. Routine and sameness start to appear and a realization that being at home with mum and possibly younger siblings may have more to offer.

I suggest:

From an early stage remind the child that you are so happy that they are attending school. Each day makes you feel that they are successful. Sometimes drawing up a chart with each day listed and colouring it in as a success chart really helps them cope with the ordinary side of the day in the first term. It is all about feeling that being at school makes you (the parent) happy and it is a successful experience. Each day can bring a surprise and a little success.

8. There are times when children talk about their work and seek your approval.

I suggest:

All attempts are gratefully accepted as legitimate samples of good work. We are about applauding the effort, not so much the outcomes at this stage. We are about teaching them that learning is a progression of trial and effort. We instill in them very early that their efforts are a success.

9. Opinions of others, which include immediate family are always important to the child. Take care to ensure that ancillary discussions around the child are positive in nature. Children quickly pick up conversations that can be destabilizing to a good start. At this early stage it is all about enjoying the learning experience.

10. School can be a long day. Kindergarten environments have various ways of resting students. A school is set up with routines and schedules that are quite different.

I suggest:

Give your child plenty of rest and take care not to introduce them too early to extra curricula activities. Teachers have considerable structure to their day which can be quite daunting and overwhelming for some children.

11. A very important aspect of the school day is getting to the school yard to play.

I suggest:

Take care not to pack heavy, over wrapped items for lunch. Children become anxious when they are not out on time playing with friends. Having a good start on the yard to play with others has more importance to a child than a well packed lunch. Make light lunches and make them enjoyable with a small, not overly sugar driven sweet. I know that lunch is not the high priority for some children. It is about having adequate time to play. Remember they are developing strategies on the schoolyard to be successful in play. This becomes quite a focus for them early in prep.

12. Children need to feel proud of their performance and will bring home many samples of work completed.

I suggest:

That samples of work are clearly displayed whereby much family discussion can applaud their efforts and discuss the work. Visual samples of work talk more to a family than some reassuring words.

13. Routine and school rules can be somewhat overwhelming when they start school.

I suggest:

Setting up a simple diary perhaps on the fridge which outlines the days of the week where different events occur such as wearing their sports uniform. This diary could also mark off each a day and talk about forthcoming events that will impact on the child.

14. Often when children leave school they struggle talking about their day. They are very aware that being successful and making the parent’s proud is important.

I suggest:

Not questioning the child about the day straight after school. They will naturally talk about it in their own time. For some children, bedtime is a good time to talk about what happened at school that day. How many of us as adults rush home to talk about our days at work? Especially, if there are occasions not to remember with joy. At this early stage of school, the child feels it is about making the parents feel happy that their child is successful. Take care not to expect too much.

15. Regular routines, sleep time and reading to children should become routine by night for the child.

I suggest:

Stick to a weekly routine during the school term. This teaches the child about boundaries and gives them a secure feeling that their school and home are strongly connected. They like to know that their teacher and parents are aware of their routine and both on the same page. Remember not to have controversial conversations about the school in front of the child. This causes them some distress and confusion.

Remember, early success at school is all about the child feeling secure and developing their own strategies in improving their performance. Small successes are important along the way. Starting school well is not about our success. Nor is it aligned to us feeling that we have performed well. Happy long term memories of early success at school are all about small steps of progressive achievements fuelled by parent’s approval. Sometimes our own