Providing balance to your child’s life.

We all need balance in our life. The last few months have challenged families in how they provide such balance and how they keep the overall momentum and spirit of the family going.

Balance is all about ensuring that variation and some real difference comes into play. Having more of the same can be restrictive, tedious and does not give the child opportunities to think in alternative ways. It hinders the ability to process different information and to succeed through various channels. When you spent those long hours working with children on the computer during the home-schooling period, did you not crave letting loose and freeing up time to do other more relaxing activities?

Classrooms are all about providing a day’s activities that contain balanced activities with recreation, spare time, alternative activities etc. The variance stimulates a child to perform better. It’s like pressing a refresher button every so often.  It is all about encouraging children to change direction and process their thoughts differently. This is excellent for stretching the brain in different directions. It enables children to look forward to activities in which they know they can succeed.

The good news is that many of the activities we enjoyed before coronavirus lockdown have returned and so now, we can plan our week confident that we can provide some balance for the week.

Consider:

• Can the children return to sport?

• Are there new sports or outdoor activities they can join?

• Given the quality time you had together in lockdown such as riding bikes etc, can this still be part of your regime?

• Have you mapped out time for homework, time for family activities? Time for personal space etc?

• Are you able to hang onto some of those great family habits of sharing time together now that we are back to post covid normal?

Your child will be adjusting to school, home, reengaging with friends, etc. Keep an eye on the balance and as a family discuss what the week should look like for all family members.

We do not live in a perfect world and families strive to be the best but this will come with twists and turns. Those twists and turns are all about finding some balance especially when times get tough and a new alignment is needed to keep the family well orientated. Such alignment will need frequent upgrades every so often.

 Families are after all a work in constant progress.

“Restore balance. Most children have technology, school and extracurricular activities covered.
It’s time to add
A pinch of adventure
A sprinkle of sunshine
and a big handle of outdoor play.”

— Penny Whitehouse

How do we cope with the “Me” generation child?

This is tricky. After all your child is part of their own generation feeding each other the same information and operating out of the same culture. When you associate with your own generation, it seems comfortable and right. We all experience this sensation. We all look back on our youth and reflect on how we interpreted the world. So too, the “Me” generation feel the same.

Everything is about them. They are the focus. Attention should be drawn to them for they are the key figures to be thought about. They are the key players in their life. Their needs come first. Hence the word “Me”.

After reflecting on this you must as a parent be feeling a little helpless and immediately want to rush to setting the rules and putting them duly in their place. I get it! Who doesn’t want their child to be everything they want them to be? Polite, generous spirited, intelligent etc. Not self centred and focussed on themselves. Afterall, we grew up with these concepts. Didn’t we?

This article has a twofold purpose. Firstly, it is to remind us that each generation make their mark and find their space and place in society. There is nothing wrong with that concept. We need to respect their right to be themselves, placed in society.

The second purpose is to remind you, the parent that you still have the responsibility to guide and direct your “Me” generation child. They need to operate in society with sound values and respect for others.

Putting others first before themselves can be the tricky point as one feature of the “Me” generation is to see themselves as number one before all others. As a parent you have your work cut out for you. Firstly, to understand and give them space to have their rightful place in society but also to be living in a society with others, justly and fairly.

Do you feel you’re raising the next ‘me’ generation?

Here are some thoughts to help you walk with your child comfortably through the process.

• Whilst your child will have their own friends, make sure they are exposed to people of different generations and races. Talk about their stories and the differences seen across the generations.

• In the home, ensure you have a set of family values that you cherish and live by. As a family talk about them regularly. This could include the value of listening to others, giving everyone a fair go, being empathetic to each other, waiting your turn and so the list goes. What matters to you as an effective family is the key point. When the values break down talk about them.

• Discuss how being part of groups and sharing is so important. This can happen through sports etc. Schools teach and encourage team activities that involve the art of cooperating and working as a team. Ask your child what they are learning at school about cooperation.

• Take note of what they are watching on television and social media. Ensure that there is as much balance as possible in their viewing. It certainly needs to be well monitored by you, the parent. The more you can encourage them to view screening time in your presence, the better.

• When watching programs together point out the values you have noticed through story. Of course, this is done well when reading books to your child.

• Keep an eye on the priorities within the family. Are you finding enough quality time together? Check in on this regularly. It can easily be watered down.

• Do you as a family talk together, share meals together, play and laugh together? All of these should be given a priority in a busy family. This may mean reducing other activities or changing patterns.  This is best done in discussion with your child. Families that work together, stay together and engage on a much higher level as a family. The desire to be family grows stronger with a child when they feel happy.

These ideas are all about stabilising your child’s life which will be caught up with so many options and values.

I understand a child must learn about their own society which involves interacting with each other and being a legitimate member of their “Me” group.

The more exposure to strong stable influences in their life, particularly their family, the greater propensity they will have for making informed choices based on considering others and not just themselves. Being a member of the “Me” generation can still include the need to think of “Others.”

“Life affords no greater respect, no greater privilege than the raising of the next generation. ”

— C Everett Koop