Anxiety is the feeling where we worry, we feel anxious and we can have a sense of dread. It can come in different forms and with different intensities. Children can have it in different forms and we can expect to see it from time to time in children as they go through various challenging stages in their life.

Here are a few ideas to help cope with the anxiety that can interfere with normal life and limit a child's ability to get on with their day to day experiences. If left for too long it can become quite serious.

Children feel anxiety just as adults do.

Be prepared. Understand that every child will have anxious moments and you are there ready to listen and understand that for the child it needs to be respected and treated sensitively.
Keep active. A child that is busy with sport, outside activities after school enjoys games etc. can easily be distracted and taken away from those anxious moments. Also a child can learn that spontaneously taking on some activity can easily reduce bouts of stress.
Listen with intent. When a child feels anxious try not to question them. ‘Why are you sad?’ Put it another way.

‘Something has upset you. I wonder what that is?’

Probing the child to find out what is upsetting them may cause them to shut down and you are left with silence. No one enjoys probing questions when feeling poorly emotionally.

Allow space. Sometimes when a child is upset or has developed anxiety about something try to give them space and not over-talk or over-direct them. To some degree it is important that they have time to process their worries and to work through some solutions for themselves. Silence can be a useful tool.
Don’t be surprised that your child does not hear you when they are experiencing some anxiety. I found quite often that children who experience some shock or sudden anxiety block out everything around them as a way of coping for a while. If this happens allow your child some time before you set any expectations on them such as having a conversation.
Teach your child the art of deep breathing. Practise it together. This is a great way of learning about relaxation. Also, there are some beautiful relaxation tapes. Ask your child to choose one that they can listen to at night to help them sleep.
Children also love their own contemporary music. They can destress listening to their kind of music. Allow their music around the house and not just restrict it to their room.
For younger children drawing, singing, dancing and painting are all enjoyable distractions from worrying about problems. Is your home inviting to all these activities?
Encourage your child to talk about their anxieties. Make it part of your family culture where anxiety is discussed openly. It is best out and boldly in the open. If a child feels comfortable in talking about their anxieties and they are being acknowledged, they have somewhere to go with them. As a model, you too can talk about your anxieties and how you deal with them. In this way we make anxieties just a normal part of our family experiences.
Once your child talks about some anxiety discuss with them about setting small goals working towards real change. For example, if your child is anxious about talking in front of the class, your first goal could be for them to talk in front of the family.
Teach your child positive self-talk. When they talk about an anxious situation talk up how you can make it positive.

‘I know I can do it.’ ‘I can swim the length of the pool.’ ‘I will do it.’

Affirmation is especially important when they overcome some anxiety:

‘I am so impressed that you went in that competition. Bravo.’

Children who suffer from anxiety need the stability of routine and discipline to give them security. Also having family meals together and providing plenty of happy family times makes them feel safe and secure.
There is nothing more off putting for anxiety than laughter, joy and a sense of connection to others.
Finally, try hard to manage your own anxiety and be open with your child telling them how you managed it and what tools you used to overcome your anxiety. Make anxiety a normal part of getting on with life.

Don’t underestimate the value of doing nothing, of just going along, listening to all things you can’t hear and not bothering.’
-Winnie the Pooh