Children vary so much in how they process information. Of course, this is all part of their overall growth. Some children though overthink matters and can build anxiety in looking at all the possibilities and where it can go all wrong. Mentally they measure out the situation in their mind and show reticence in putting themselves forward. Some children look for the negative in a situation and become so concerned about the risk and potential fear related to the challenge.

Of course, there are some children who simply plough ahead and do not reflect on risk or outcomes at all. These children are often more easy going and are often thought to be more carefree and risk taking.

However, for our overthinkers life can be a little trickier as they negotiate their way through the maze of school matters, home pressures, friendship groups etc. As parents we can look at some strategies to help them relax more and just simply enjoy the undulating ride of childhood.

Here are a few suggestions.

If your child looks worried or seems to be processing information too slowly try saying

Here are some tips to help your child to process information without overthinking matters.

“What positives have just been heard?”

“How can we make this a simple thought?”

When a child shows that they are overthinking, break it up for them.

“Ok so you have a test. Let’s talk about that.”

“What part of the test is on your mind?”

Talk positively about matters that can lead to overthinking. Ensure that in your conversation there is a level of optimism and hope.

In working with children, I would often invite the child to write down what was on their mind and together we would break it up into possibilities. This helped them learn to cope with situations that at first seemed too difficult. Getting them to repeat back what was on their mind made it easier to break up the concerns into possibilities.

Sometimes overthinkers are worried about being right or anxious about making errors. What we need to do is to remind them that we reward effort not necessarily outcome.

“You seem to be thinking a lot about the race tomorrow.”

“Well done for having a go and working through what is on your mind. Let’s talk about the concerns you have for tomorrow.”

The idea here is to teach the child that overthinking can lead to too much worry and unnecessary complication. Best to look at situations in a simple, positive and possible way.