Consider what is holding us back in many ways. If we are always focusing on helping our children, we also need to think about matters that we can turn around in our own life.

Sometimes we preoccupy ourselves with self doubt. We are quick to think its too hard, too difficult or not within our realm of capabilities. We have a tendency to inflate the threat in our mind and this can cause a shutdown of interest, in pushing further with the idea or activity. Show your child that we can manage self doubt by focusing on positive feelings about achievement. If your child sees how you push ahead with determination and avoid the negative feelings that make you doubt your ability, they will learn to be determined and start to develop a non defeatist mentality.

Parenting is always about helping our children, we often forget ourselves. Here are some ways that you can better yourself and be a role model for your child.

Beware perfectionism. It’s a killer when it comes to living comfortably around all sorts of things on a daily basis. It can make you feel vulnerable and never satisfied, anxious about not completing things. Even if you have this tendency, talk to your child about how it can make life difficult for you. Show them that perfectionism can bring you down and take care not to put too much pressure on them. Remind your child that they are good enough to do all sorts of things and they should take up opportunities where possible.

Remember that we have moments of feeling socially disengaged ourselves. Sometimes it is easier to stay disengaged and not put ourselves out there with others. Talk to your child if you have these feelings and tell them how you are working to solve them. Being socially engaged is critical for self development. Keep an eye on your child’s swings as your role is to motivate and encourage their social skills across many groups.

Remember we are not perfect individuals. As adults and parents we have all the usual fears and phobias that anyone can have across the years. The challenge for us is to be honest with our children and let them see that life is a work in progress. You are working on your own agendas and by inviting your child into learning about the strategies and tactics you use to help you, real understanding and teaching occurs. Your child loves you implicitly. They will be very sympathetic and will understand your journey better if you keep them in the loop. Rather than letting your child live around your own struggles and challenges, allow them in to see how you work on feeling better, getting better and setting goals. They are very sensitive to your emotional triggers and the more they understand about what presses your buttons, the more tolerant they are to the situation.

You will be surprised how their developing empathy and love can do a lot of good for all the family.

                   ‘I don’t want my children to follow in my footsteps
           I want them to take the path next to me and go further than
                   I could have ever dreamt possible.’
                                                                              -Picture quotes.com