The home environment takes on a special magic for your child. Here are some thoughts about how your efforts in decorating for Christmas can have long-term value and memory-making moments for your children.
Read MoreThe activities that we choose to do in our leisure time certainly define us. It is worth contemplating how we use leisure time and how this influences our children.
How we show commitment and prioritise is all about leisure time. Are we a family that hitches up the caravan and disappears to the beach? Leisure time should be modelled for the children as high-quality hours quite separated from the hustle and bustle of work, school, etc.
The activities that we choose to do in our leisure time certainly define us.
Children need to learn that there are clear separations with leisure time from regular life. This teaches them that leisure time is an important investment in life. It nourishes the soul as well as the body.
The more they come to value the experiences, the more they will be searching for it in their own lives.
Take care to ensure that leisure is active and engaging. Watching television, screen time on computers is not giving direct attention to breaking from routine and setting up activities that provide real leisure for all the family.
Teachers invite students to plan leisure activities that will be enjoyed by the whole class. Often this involves active activities such as sport, art etc. Sometimes school excursions are all about celebrating leisure time together. It is a great bonding agent.
A few thoughts about developing sound leisure time:
Invite the whole family into a discussion about how they want to use leisure time.
Take risks. Suggest new leisure activities that take everyone out of their comfort zones. Our character reflects the leisure we choose.
Research what is available and within your parameters as a family.
Plan leisure time regularly and talk about it as part of your family routine. Let it become an important way of life and not just an incidental holiday.
Get the children involved in the planning and if it involves gathering and packing equipment, this can be a wonderful way for them to become involved. Let them own some of the leisure plans and preparations.
Remind yourself that creating effective leisure time with the family is yet another way of supporting their mental growth and demonstrating the value of rest and recovery from the routine of life. It strengthens self-awareness and is an important way of expressing family.
“‘In our leisure we reveal what kind of people we are.’”
Do you know or remember people in your life as a child that were happy? Did they laugh a lot and were they smiling often? No surprise that people with a positive, happy disposition attract other people easily. In fact, laughing is absolutely contagious and can influence very quickly the culture of a group of people gathered.
In Japan I hear of laughing clubs where people come together regularly, simply to have a good hearty laugh. This is seen as stress-busting and releases all the positive endorphins into the bloodstream. It makes you feel good and less focussed on being around negative influences. People say that it is quite uplifting and the more they have, the more they want.
We all want to feel better and we certainly are easily drawn to positive people. Children are always hoping that when their teacher is allocated for the new year that they get the teacher who is fun and enjoys a good laugh. Learning can come with more ease when a child feels that they are with someone who does not judge but sees the best in them. Warm-hearted people are never seen as judgemental people.
Laughter is a fabulous stress buster!
Teachers also are very aware that they have higher productivity from the children when the classroom is operating on a happy, positive note.
By being in the bosom of a family that enjoys a good laugh, the child feels happy and the optimism carries over to so many areas of their life. Who wants to feel down when you can feel up more often.
Whist I appreciate that we cannot laugh all day, it is still important to build into your routine with children some positive happy times that simply bring joy to everyone. This gives them a positive feeling and keeps the blues at bay. It breeds optimism and hope.
It is amazing how two people can see the same situation differently. One may see the glass half full, the other half empty.
Give yourself permission to be a person that enjoys a good laugh every now and again.
In working with children, it was sometimes possible to simply share a joke together. This was a wonderful icebreaker and set both child and Principal at ease. Sometimes at the cost of forgetting the problem to be discussed!
A few thoughts:
If you are having a flat day try not to share too much of that with your child. If possible, come in on all the opportunities for a laugh together. This will lift your spirits as well.
What about when the family shares a meal together. This is an excellent time to share a laugh. Ask the question:
‘Did anyone have something funny happen to them today?’
Funny movies can bring much relaxation and humour to the family who shares it together.
When your child tells you something funny that happened share in the laughter. Let your child know that you enjoy hearing the lighter side of their day.
Children are quite spontaneous with their humour. You can learn a lot from merely being around your child. Their joy and laughter is infectious. Above all, allow laugher into your life and it will flow onto your child very spontaneously.
“You don’t stop laughing because you grow older.
Your grow older because you stop laughing.”
I have been giving this some thought and I want to tell you a story that may trigger some ideas. Many years ago, when I was a young teacher and very interested in developing the creative side to my class, my students and I all decided to turn the classroom into a pirate ship. We had been reading an adventure book on pirates which captured the children’s imagination. This was an extraordinary adventure. We took at least one week to build the ship and surrounds. We researched what an old ship would look like and found all sorts of pieces with which to put it together. Desks were removed from the classroom. The whole room was the ship. Much to the displeasure of the Principal, we were determined to keep this room alive and for the next few weeks we learnt all about the ship, how winds moved and influenced sailing. We learnt about tides, wrote poetry etc. It was an incredible adventure and a joy in all of us building a slow steady piece of art from which we had so much enjoyment and learning. Years later, I met up with students who still remembered the experience. This became a powerful learning tool.
Need some creative ideas during self isolation?
What I am saying here is, consider doing something quite innovative at home. Given the length of time you may be housebound, let your house become the creative space. How about setting up a room which can be converted into something creative where the children can experience play and learning?
Perhaps a game room?
Invite the children into brainstorming what that room could look like and using all sorts of scraps etc. Be generous enough to let them experiment.
Also consider painting a room. Under instruction, a child can assist.
The garden is an extraordinarily creative space. How about the children making an art piece for the garden? This could take some time, perhaps several days. The joy is in the process. How about painting the rocks, setting up a chicken coup etc?
Of course, cooking especially baking is a wonderful creative exercise for children. Consider it hospitality 101 at home.
Are there arts and crafts you can teach your child such as knitting, sewing? I hear macramé is back in fashion. Check out places like art and craft shops, junk yards, op shops, etc. that can offer cheap supplies for art and craft activities.
I have recently heard of a dad building a bike with his children using old parts.
Do you have old bikes, toys etc. that could be used for the creation of an art piece? Children love pulling apart old equipment.
If your home will be your total sanctuary for several weeks, set it up to accommodate movement and space for the children. Remove objects that will create stress when damaged. This is important for your sanity. Accept that for a few weeks the home will be a different space in which to live. It will be a space for active living.
Can you build a cubby house with your children, a go-carts etc? It is all about doing activities that require a focus, time and patience.
How about technology. Look online for some short courses that are enjoyable and have a learning aspect to them. Of course, minimise screen time.
How about making home videos, writing songs etc.
Children thrive on being creative and if you create a home environment that enables them to express themselves, they can entertain themselves in unique and intuitive ways over longer sustained periods.
“Creativity is contagious. Pass it on.”
Isn’t it wonderful how much joy we gain from watching our children? Their laughter, childhood ways, imagination and sense of fun give us life.
This article is inviting us to stop and reflect on how children are a source of joy. We can learn so much about the beauty of life through their eyes. After all, being an adult can be very boring. It can also drain our sense of fun and reduce our awareness of all that is life-giving around us.
Let your child show you the way to being lighter and more positive about life.
At school, it was my common practice that if I was a having a bad day, weighed down by various matters, I would take myself around to the classrooms, just to enjoy the chatter, humour and life in the classroom. It lifted my spirits and made me realise how much I can learn from children. Let’s consider our children’s youthfulness as a happy pill and one that puts us in a better mental framework.
Their simple wisdom, unshakeable love for their parents, innocence when it comes to seeing the best or worse in a situation, teaches us that sometimes we can adopt a lighter more manageable approach to life.
All that we understand can be seen from different, less judgemental eyes. All that we see can be understood with better understanding and more general acceptance. As children have their faith in those around them, they can teach us how not to lose hope and belief in others. They also teach us how to simplify understandings, taking out the anger and hurt.
Here are some thoughts that invite us to reflect on times with our children that can be beneficial for improving our spirit and disposition.
Laugh with your children. See the funny side to their actions.
Listen to their words. Often simply expressed but with powerful messages.
Watch them play and join in to the experience. They often talk about all sorts of interesting things when playing. It is especially enjoyable listening to their chatter in a sandpit.
Children love to draw. Watch them and talk about what their drawings are all about. As an adult doodling can be another form of drawing in a state of relaxation.
Sing with your child. Some of the songs you will know and the repetition is often comforting.
Enjoy the changing expressions on their faces and the interesting body language. These shift so regularly and are a key to how they are processing information.
Let your child know that you learn from them.
“I love the way you use play dough. Can you show me how you created that shape?”
Children have a different sense of time to busy adults. Perhaps we can adopt more time to things we enjoy doing and reduce the busy things we do that clutter the day.
Allow them to be creative. This can go in many directions that will surprise you. Their creativity abounds in so many ways.
Remind yourself by talking to your children about the fun parts of your childhood. What made you laugh and what drove your spirit.
This article invites the parent to simply enjoy the moments with their children and notice the unique childlike manner that is so attractive to them.
Time passes quickly and those moments where we learn about our child in their childhood become less and less as they grow older. My belief is that if we capture their joy, we will carry it with us and it will give us some positive feelings along the way.
Let your child show you the way to being lighter and more positive about life. Adopt a little of their liveliness and enjoy the day.
“If you carry your childhood with you, you never become older.”
One of the great advantages of being a parent is that your child will take you through all the stages of growth, physically, intellectually, socially and emotionally. They will reintroduce you to childlike ways. How much therapy can that be!
Playing with your children brings more benefits than you realise.
Whilst I appreciate our children can be exhausting and frustrating from time to time, they do give us such wonderful opportunities to relive our childhood in some way. Perhaps your childhood wasn’t so much fun, now is a time to enjoy the innocence and simple joy of being a child with your own child.
Sometimes being an adult and maintaining the pressure of living up to many and varied expectations can be very waring.
When you take time out to share in some fun and uncomplicated joy with your child, the world is a happier place to be. It also demonstrates to your child, that you can relax and share in their world, with all its magic and imagination. You are modelling that their world has its own charm and meaning in which you want to share. You are valuing their world and not placing expectations on them to be sensible, grown up etc.
In working with children, I was in a very blessed space as a workplace. If I wanted to ease the pressure of the office, I would often enjoy playing the games on the yard with the students, join in netball games, share in choir etc. I certainly felt better from being part of their world. I would return to the office much refreshed.
Consider:
Visiting sandpits and together play in them. Beaches are wonderful spaces to play in the sand, no matter what age the child. They provide a wonderful climate to play sport such as cricket etc. Notice all the fun, families have on beaches in Summer. Beaches provide entertainment for all.
Playing formal games at home. Simple games such as monopoly can provide hours of fun.
Play Lego with the children. Are you as creative or as skilled as them?
Drama is a great imaginative tool. Act out simple plays and stories together. Children love the dress ups. Join in with them. Sometimes using music, singing together leads to much joy. Dramatizing books being read is also a great fun way to engage.
Physical activities such as bike riding together, rollerblading and other active games in the park can lead to so much enjoyment.
Children love to write imaginative stories. You can join in and add sections to it.
Draw together. This can be even using chalk on the concrete.
Invite your child to recommend the game and join in. Younger children are very quick to create stories and adventures.
These considerations may not be new to you but the following reasoning is behind the idea of joining in the world of the child.
It is mentally healthy to play and relax. What better way than to do it with your children.
As an adult taking a break from being a grown up is a positive way to improve mental health. Sometimes maintaining the adult in you is hard work.
By joining in with your child, you relive some memories and trigger some smiles. All positive for everyone concerned.
Finally, who says we have to lose all our childhood and grow up.
A better-balanced adult who can see life from many angles including that of a child is a more interesting person with high emotional intelligence.
“Be small and childlike. There is no simpler, better way to see the big picture. ”