Who likes going to bed? Do I hear a resounding “yes” from tired parents or a reluctant “no” as there is so much to do when the child has gone to bed. Bedtime is a tricky and difficult time for some families. If you are a family with strong, regular routine and a fair amount of house discipline, you may find this not an issue. However, many families due to the various ages of children in the family, the variable nature of the week etc. struggle in finding that this is the best part of their day!
It was quite obvious in the school setting that some children needed more sleep than others, some went to bed with ease and anticipation and others were quite often dozing in the afternoon. You certainly do not need a lecture from me as I also struggled with this issue as a busy parent.
When working with children, I noticed that those students who liked routine and order were often able to adjust to sleeping at the same time each night according to their parents. Camps proved this as some children despite all the noise and excitement were asleep by 8:00p.m!
Research tells us that regular sleep patterns and plenty of sleep are needed for a healthy mind and body. Consider the following ideas that may help some families in establishing reasonable patterns with regard to bedtime.
Have a family meeting at the beginning of the week and look at the plans for that week. Discuss what time is agreed upon to go to bed each night. This may vary a little subject to family demands.
Discuss what bedtime looks like for each child. Is it reading for half an hour, listening to music etc? It may be different for each child subject to age and interests. Also daylight saving may present different challenges for bedtime arrangements.
Set up a chart perhaps on the fridge and agree to tick off each day after everyone has honoured the arrangements.
If the night before was successful remember to affirm everyone for their efforts. If not so successful gently discuss what prevented the plan from working well.
Parents should also put their plans in place and use the chart to show the children how important it is to reflect on how much sleep they are getting each night.
Check the environment in which the the child is sleeping. Are there too many lights to distract them set up around the house. This also applies to noise around the house at bedtime.
Sometimes children do need a soft light to assist in sleeping. This is all about discussing with them what makes them comfortable at bedtime. Respecting each child's feelings about sleep is important so that they understand you are listening as a parent to their concerns.
Also note that if the child is highly active before bed this could delay their ability to settle. Consider how to slow down the house stimulation before bedtime. Some parents find turning down lights is helpful to calm the home environment.
Whilst we all desire the routine and regularity of bedtime, I believe it is best to make it a weekly family discussion so that everyone is aware that regular sleep is valued in the family.
We are all working towards maintaining the best situation possible under the pressures of the week.
Happy sleeping!
